BLACK OPS CHAIR COMMANDO

WILDLY KRAZY Aug 19, 2018 0

During my wedding night, a "Navy Seal" threatened several Marines.

August 19, 2018 [WILDLY KRAZY]—On February the 19th of 2009? Fuck…I forgot when I got married… Anyways, sometime ago, I got married….

Of course, Marines of all rank and backgrounds came to the wedding, dressed in our Dress Blues, along with my Lions…my street crew—fuckers I grew up on the streets with…

After the wedding, on the way to the reception, my wife and I took everyone out for drinks…

Deciding to go to 54th Street for a few drinks, about twenty-four of us—the main wedding party, such as the bridesmaids and shit—occupied three tables in the center of the restaurant.

Sexified in Dress Blues, and surround by sexy fuckers in tuxedos and dresses, several people stood up, shaking all of the Marine's hands, thanking us as we were walking through, headed for our tables…. Whatever…I do not get into that whole bullshit of thanking a veteran, because it is way over the top, and unneeded.

Sitting at the table, we ordered dozens of shots and long necks… Within less than an hour of drinking, our bill came to damn near $500-dollars… Well, of course, I pulled out the debit card, about to hand it to the waitress….

"Oh no…the bill is already paid for. Several people pitched in and covered the bill; have a great night, and congratulations," the waitress told us.

To this day, I have no idea who or how many people paid for our bill that night, but to whoever did, thank you!

Instead of renting out a party hall, we decided to rent out a club…with a bartender and dance floor...thus, we had this whole side of the club to ourselves, and in the other room, it was filled with the public…people coming in to have drinks and to dance.

When our wedding group arrived, everyone was already there, waiting on us. At the time, my wife was in medical school at the University Missouri Kansas City [UMKC], so dozens of medical and law students showed up; plus, Krazees from high school, and my Lions from the streets; and of course, family, too.

As the fucker getting married, I had more drinks bought for me than I could count that night. Within two hours, after drinking a dozen Wild Turkey shots, plus countless pitchers of beer, I was staggering, and my face was thumb to the touch.

With drunk Marines, college students, and fuckers from the street, we threw a hell of a party that night, too…

I remember having to go to the bathroom, and when I walked in, all six urinals were occupied with Marines and college students, bent over puking. I am standing there, taking a piss, and one of my Marine buddies was right next to me, puking…sounding like a demonic possession.

"Are you alright, fucker?" I asked, as he bent over, puking.

"I'm good…I'm good," he said, as he puked some more.

In fact, that was his fourth time puking that night… He'd puke, and go directly to the bar, and grab another pitcher of beer, and repeat the same cycle six times that night.

For some odd reason, the night club had this realistic, looking naked female mannequin up on the DJ stage… I mean, this bitch was detailed...trimmed, fake pussy hair, and everything. Beautifully painted in detail, down to the eyes, freckles, and nipples, the mannequin had blonde hair, blue eyes, and B-size pierced tits. Yes, real nipple rings... If I wasn't married, I would have probably tried to take the mannequin home that night…because I was drunk…and that is my excuse.

Anyways, drunk and fucked up, mentally, the several Marines took the mannequin to the dance floor, dirty dancing. This mannequin, I shit you not, was bendable, too, so you could put her in different poses…say doggy style for instance. For hours, that mannequin was sexually fondled and molested by Marines and college students, alike...even by females...and random strangers from the public...

Eventually, the public started coming over, and bullshitting with our wedding crew, and partying with us. Within three hours, we had at-least 100-200 strangers partying with us…fuckers we never met in our life.

One chick decided to flash her tits, so of course, within minutes, she had at-least four Marines freak dancing with her, in a dance orgy…

Standing there holding up the wall, making sure it did not fall over and collapse on the party, I could barely see anyone… In fact, everyone looked blurred, and they moved in slow-motion….

Kind of like this creepy bitch…

Speaking of the Ring, my wife and I were talking about that movie the other day…

"If that creepy bitch walked out of my TV, I would have drop kicked her in the fucking teeth," I told my wife.

"I don't think your kick would affect her ghostly, demonic powers… She would just kill you," my wife explained…

"Then, as a ghost, I would drag that bitch out of her well, and beat her ass," I declared.

You know, I have never understood how anyone died in the movie "Child's Play," by Chuckie… How is it possible to die by a doll? Drop kick that motherfucker, and why in the holy fuck do people explore the noise in a creepy, dark room, in a haunted house?

I do not care how much noises come from that creepy ass basement, because my ass will not explore shit without a rifle or shotgun in my hand, and if I see a spooky looking bitch down there, guarantee that house will have a new doorway, because I will claw and chew my way out of that fucking house, in seconds, screaming like a little bitch in the process.

Let us not forget, either, the women running in the woods in high heels from a masked psycho, with a machete…

"Friday the 13th" always pissed me off, too, because of the vast stupidity on that movie from the victims… Running in high heels in the woods, the female is running from a fucker that walks, but nevertheless, every second, she falls like a distressed princess, until he finally catches her…

Every time, here I am, sitting on the couch as a certified horror survivalist screaming at the movie…

"No! Take off those fucking heels, and run down the middle of the road…not in the woods! No bitch, not a frying pan! Find a gun! Not a 9mm! You need a fucking AK! AK! Find an AK! Pull it out of your ass!"

How is it possible to live in America and never able to find a gun when a masked psycho is chasing you? Apparently, Jason's victims must live on the East or West Coasts, because in the Midwest, we get boners thinking about someone trying to attack us with a machete...

I just do not understand it... Remember those old vampire movies, where the fucker just walked up and bit those fuckers on the neck? How the fuck is that possible? I am telling you, that vampire would have a hell of time biting me, because I'd be hauling ass, sprinting like a runaway slave... Dear lord, forgive me for that...

If I died from a vampire, teeth marks in my ass is all the police would find, because the vampire would have to leap, just to catch me.

I mean, how does a vampire just walk up and bite you on the neck, without a fight?

"How did he die?"

"Not sure... Teeth marks in his ass is all that we found...."

Anyways, one of my Marine buddies…a sergeant…combat, Iraqi veteran…walks up to the bar, to buy a drink.

A few feet away, two middle-aged men sit at the bar… One of the overweight guys tells the sergeant, "you need to get your Marines under control—they're loud, and annoying!"

"They're Marines on leave, at a wedding, having a good time, inside of a club," the Marine sergeant tells the guy.

"I'm a fucking ex-Navy Seal, and none of my Seals acted like that," the middle age man tells the Marine sergeant.

"Good for you…would you like a drink," the sergeant asked, being a smart ass.

"If you and your Marines do not settle down, I will jump up and kick all of your asses myself," the middle aged man said, dressed in biker apparel and leather.

Mind you, most of the Marines at the wedding were decorated Iraq and Afghanistan combat Marines...infantry; plus, Army combat veterans that I knew from the street. Not only that, but the dude was outnumbered a dozen infantry Marines and Soldiers to one Seal…if he was actually a Navy Seal. Clearly, the dude was drunk…or stupid…possibly both…

Walking up to me, the sergeant tells me, "this Navy Seal says he is going to kick all of our asses, if we do not sit down."

"Navy Seal? I don't see a fucking Navy Seal," I replied, looking for a Navy Seal decked out in a Navy Uniform, with his trident.

"No, no…he's a civilian now," the sergeant replied, pointing over at the biker guy with his biker buddy.

"Fuck that dude; let's go piss him off some more," I said, as I took another shot, as I held up the wall from collapsing.

Grabbing a couple of my Army buddies, some of my Lions, and the Marines, along with the bridesmaids, we all go over and surround the two men, screaming, laughing, and taking shots.

"You undisciplined Jarheads better get away from me, before I jump up off this chair," the "Navy Seal" said.

Just as he said that, his biker buddy jumped up, not saying a word, and left the club…

"Calm down Seal Pup Operator," I said to the "Navy Seal."

"You Marines are the most undisciplined sacks of shit I have ever met; you'd never make it as a Navy Seal…or the Navy," the "Navy Seal" said…

"Probably not… I cannot swim—that's why I decided to go to Ranger school," one of the Marines said.

Ssssshhhhh….I am going to tell you a classified secret…do not tell anyone…but Marines are part of the Navy…

"Calm down, Seal Pup Operator…here is a shot on me…out of respect to a Navy Seal…a bad ass motherfucking, operator and a ninja assassin," I said, as I handed him a shot of Jack and Coke.

"What country were you operating in?" the Marine sergeant asked the "Navy Seal."

"Cambodia; dozens of gooks died at my hands," the Navy Seal replied, slurring his words…probably drunker than we were.

"A Vietnam veteran? That requires another Jack and Coke," I said…

For 30-minutes, we continued talking to the "Navy Seal," and before he finally left, I think I bought him seven Jacks and Cokes, out of respect of his expertise of being a badass operator, with his tacticool stories.

Apparently, I'll never be a badass operator, doing tacticool operator, ninja assassin shit… However, I did masturbate to this video…does that make me a bad ass?