FOUR HORSEMEN CIVIL WAR

July 8, 2018 [WILDLY KRAZY]—For the first time, we had one of our parties at my 'mansion', the weekend before the Fourth of July. We actually paid for a little vacation for my parents in exchange they allow us to throw the party while they were gone.

We handed them $1,500 and a hotel room for a mini-vacation down to the Ozarks in south Missouri, while we threw one of the largest parties we ever had.

My parents 'mansion' is considered historical in Saint Joseph, Missouri, as it is a former slave house during the Civil War, which was built in 1847. There are hidden passages and escape tunnels behind the walls and in the basement of my parent's house, where slave owners would hide slaves during the Civil War. At that time, Missouri was a split state during the war, which meant some Missourians fought for the Confederate, while others fought for the Union—against slavery.

My parent's house is mere blocks away from the house of famous outlaw, Jesse James.

Brad Pitt would later play Jesse James in the movie "The Assassination of Jesse James."

You see, Saint Joseph has some history behind it. Eminem was born in Saint Joseph in 1972, and KRAZED's mother knew Eminem's uncle, Ronnie Pokingharn, which involved the FBI, before Ronnie committed suicide. We will leave it at that.

Small world, right?

The 'mansion' is a massive three story house that sits on Hall Street Historic District—"locally as "mansion row" or "millionaire's row," Hall Street housed some of the wealthiest residents of Old Saint Jo, a town that boasted the highest per-capita income in the United States during the Victorian gilded age."

I included the link, if you want to see the old, beautiful houses from the Civil War and Victorian era.

Let me tell you, my parents' place is one of the creepiest houses you will ever sleep in, as we all have seen and heard weird shit in that 'mansion'; however, that is for a different story.

I am 'Mike', the guy whose mom had the red dildo, just for better understanding for this article. We bought the house several years after the Big Red event.

Anyways, we had at-least 350 people show up, as the theme was glow in the dark with body paint…a party that almost caused a Civil War between the Four Horsemen, threatening to split our group, forever.

How ironic is that?

We had removed all of the light bulbs in the house and replaced them with UV light bulbs, while placing 60 tubes of various colors of glow in the dark body paint in a large cardboard box for our party guest. We also had about 10 to 12 boxes of glow in the dark sticks, bracelets and necklaces for guest to use.

Everyone at the party glowed, as everyone either wore glow in the dark bracelets and necklaces, or a combination of glow in the dark body paint and bracelets and necklaces.

Damn near everyone wore athletic shorts or bathing suits, as they covered themselves in various designs and patterns, as if we were a glow in the dark tribe of lunatics.

The sexiest person at the party, in my opinion, was the sexy Asian from Missouri Western University who wore a white bathing suit, while covered in purple glow in the dark body paint, and red hand-prints across her entire body.

Brandon and Matt were selling alcohol, of course, while KRAZED and I, along with the bouncers, refereed the 'dance floor', ensuring no one broke the fight rule at the party.

"Steven! [KRAZED]" Big Boy shouted.

"What, Krazee?" KRAZED asked Big Boy.

"Come turn me into a pumpkin," Big Boy shouted, as he held orange and yellow glow in the dark body paint.

"A pumpkin?" KRAZED asked, laughing.

"Ya! I'm going to be Charlie Brown's great pumpkin," Big Boy said, excitedly, as he took off his shirt, revealing his d-size tits.

Using orange, KRAZED covered Big Boy's chest, back and arms, while using yellow to draw a jack-o-lantern onto Big Boy's chest and stomach. The two yellow eyes covered Big Boy's tits and nipples, while the nose covered his belly-button, and the mouth stretched across his lower stomach.

After doing that, Camila and Echo walked up, telling KRAZED to take off his shirt and get covered in body paint; however, KRAZED refused.

If you haven't already noticed, KRAZED is a little weird about some things, and still is to this day.

KRAZED had one of the most muscular bodies at our school, especially at the party, as he played basketball and football, and lifted and worked out, daily, but despite that, he would never take his shirt off, unless he was having sex or streaking.

It makes no damn sense, but if KRAZED wore shorts or pants, he had to have a shirt on as well. The only way that shirt was coming off is if his shorts or pants came off, too.

After refusing to take his shirt off and put on body paint, Camila leaned over to me, smiled and whispered, "we'll just get him drunk."

"Ya, but then he'll end up naked, too," I replied, laughing.

"More than likely," Camila said, laughing.

In the middle of the dance floor, two chicks danced topless, while the third danced butt-ass-naked, all covered in body paint, while half a dozen guys stood around watching and dancing.

Next to us, chicks were taking body shots off their girlfriend, Krisha, while Echo, Camlia, and KRAZED joined the action. Krisha is one of our Krazees, and the girl that KRAZED slept with in middle school, causing Alexandria, KRAZED's "first love", to break up with him.

Minutes later, we hear girls screaming from the dance floor. Some guy was trying to dance and feel up on a chick, but she did not like it, so she pushed him and he then smacks her across the face. Within seconds, Big Boy, KRAZED, Brandon, Thomas and 3 bouncers had the guy pinned to the floor, punching him in the face until he went limp. They then carried him outside, and, literally, tossed him from the porch and into the front yard, while his home-boys stood by and watched.

After getting tossed from the porch, his home-boys run outside to fetch their friend, before leaving in their car.

Two hours later, KRAZED, Big Boy, myself, Camila, Echo, Krisha, along with a few others had been playing suicide, so we were drunk off our asses at that point in the party.

After finishing our last shot of vodka, KRAZED falls over, smacking the floor, hard.

"Ouch!" KRAZED shouts, as we all stand over him, laughing.

"Are you alright?" I asked KRAZED, laughing.

"Everything is spinning… The room is spinning…" KRAZED said, as he laid on his back, looking up at us.

"Help me up—I need to piss," KRAZED said, as Big Boy and I helped him to his feet.

"I'm fucking hot…it is hot in here… Are you fuckers hot?" KRAZED asked, slurring and stumbling across the house as I helped him walk.

"Take off your shirt then, crazy ass," Camila said, laughing.

"I can't—I can't even feel my face," KRAZED said, as he leaned up against me.

"Here—I'll help you," Camila said, as she pulled KRAZED's shirt off.

At that point, I knew KRAZED was wasted, beings he took off his shirt without stripping naked.

"Help me go pee," KRAZED said to me.

"We have to go outside because there are people in there fucking," I informed KRAZED.

We went outside to piss, as I stood next to KRAZED by my house, as he leaned up against the house, while dozens of people stood outside in my backyard partying.

As we're standing there, KRAZED starts pissing all over my shoes, so I turn to look at KRAZED, and I see him leaned up against the house with his eyes closed, and some girl jerking him off, as he pissed.

"Who the fuck are you?" I asked the girl.

"A friend of Steven's," she said, smiling.

"I don't know you—never seen you in my life," I said to the girl.

"Steven [KRAZED], who is this girl?" I asked KRAZED, as she stood up against the house, damn near passed out with his eyes closed.

"What girl?" he asked.

"The girl jerking you off," I said.

"Is she doing a good job?" KRAZED asked, as he laughed, drunkenly, until he turned over to look at the girl, as he continued to piss.

After I asked the chick for her identity, she let go of KRAZED's dick, but she still stood there right beside him as he pissed.

"Hey! I know you! You're the sophomore cheerleader from school…the one in my weight lifting class" KRAZED said, slurring and smiling.

"Yes," she said, smiling.

"She just wants to see my wiener…she's a virgin…I talk dirty to her in class…," KRAZED said to me, smiling and slurring his word.

"Come on—you're drunk; time to get you inside," I said.

"Hold on I'm pissing…" KRAZED said.

"How much piss can a person piss?" I asked, as KRAZED continued to piss for damn near a minute.

Finally after pissing, the cheerleader and I helped KRAZED back into the house, where we sat him in a chair, next to the dance floor—where he would sit for the next 30-minutes sobering up, while he damn near passed out in the chair.

I walk over to Matt, as Brandon made out with two chicks, while he fingered one through her skirt.

"How much have we made so far?" I asked Matt.

"Damn near $800," Matt replied.

"Who are those chicks?" I asked, as I pointed to Brandon making out with two chicks.

"I don't know—he's been talking to them all damn night. Just some chicks from Savannah…" Matt replied.

"Where's Levi?" I asked Matt.

"I don't know, but he's been in a piss-poor mood all night," Matt said.

"For what?" I asked.

"His girl broke up with him today…" Matt said.

"She's here at the party—I saw her outside when I took Steven [KRAZED] to piss," I said.

"Ya, I know—she broke up with him two hours before the party," Matt replied.

"Is that her excuse to get strange-dicked tonight?" I asked Matt.

"Actually, she found texts on Levi's phone from other girls… Switch that shit around," Matt pointed out.

"Oh shit…" I said, feeling like a dumbass for the statement I made about Levis' ex-girl, Ashley.

"How's Steven [KRAZED]?" Matt asked, as we watched Camila, Echo, and the cheerleader rub body paint all his arms and upper body.

"See that chick? Not Echo—not Camila—but the other chick; the blonde," I said.

"Ya…she goes to our school..a cheerleader…what about her?" Matt asked.

"You know her, too?" I asked Matt.

"Ya—she's cool; she's in my weightlifting class with Steven and I. We talk to her all the time. Why?" Matt asked.

"Fuck… I didn't know who she was… She came up and started jacking Steven off while he was pissing," I said, laughing.

"No shit? Ya, she told me she has the hots for him, but I tried telling her that Steven won't fuck around with her, because she's a virgin," Matt said, laughing.

"What did she say?" I asked Matt.

"She asked why Steven did not date or sleep with virgins. I told her I had no clue…it's just one of his codes," Matt said, as we both watched one of our teacher's daughter get a trained pulled on her by four dudes in a room across from us.

A few seconds later, we hear moaning from our right. Looking over towards Brandon, Matt and I see one of the chicks riding Brandon in a chair, as he fingered her asshole beneath her skirt.

"On that note, I'm going to go check on Steven," I said, laughing.

"Thanks, asshole—go have all the fun," Matt said, disappointed, as he sat selling liquor.

"You're off during tomorrow's party, and then you can get laid; Steven and I have liquor duty tomorrow," I said, laughing.

"Ya, but there's a lot of hot chicks here tonight, especially went the body paint," Matt said, disappointed.

"Do what Steven does—hand out a few free shots for a quick boob show. Hell, do you remember last weekend? He got head at the liquor stand for six free shots… Just remember the rule; no more than $30-dollars worth of free liquor," I reminded Matt.

Matt gave me the street salute and I walked off to check on KRAZED.

Echo, Camila, the cheerleader, and a few bouncers stood next to KRAZED as he sat in the wooden chair sobering up. KRAZED was covered in red body paint, with yellow flames as designs.

"You look like a butt-flamer in heat," I told KRAZED, laughing.

"And you look like a fairy-fag," KRAZED said, laughing, referring to the rainbow that some of the girls painted on me.

"I'm leaving," Stephanie said, as she came up and gave us all a hug good-bye.

"Already? It's just begun," KRAZED told Stephanie.

"Ya…I have to get up in three hours for work," Stephanie reminded us.

"Motor-boat before you leave," KRAZED told Stephanie, with a shit-eating-grin.

Stephanie was a busty, curvy girl, with the largest tits in school…some of the best tits I have ever fondled, and her pussy off the chain…very…very…nice… Stephanie is one of our Krazees. She is now a nurse in Kansas City, Missouri, at Saint Luke's hospital.

"Okay," Stephanie said, smiling, as she lifted up her shirt, allowing KRAZED to smash his face between her tits, damn near hiding his entire head.

"My turn!" I demanded, as I did the same.

"Bye, love—be safe going home," KRAZED told Stephanie.

"Bye—I'll see you guys tomorrow," Stephanie said, waving, as she walked out of the door.

KRAZED was finally some what sober, before he demanded another rematch with Big Boy at waterfall, trying to take the championship title from Big Boy.

After nine-straight cans of beer, KRAZED falls over, out of the chair, after losing the match to Big Boy.

"Drunk again?" Camila asked, laughing.

"Help me up—I'm hot again—I need to get this paint off my body," KRAZED said, handing out his hands to two of our bouncers.

The bouncers pick KRAZED up, and he stumbles toward the showers.

"Where're you going, fucker?" I asked KRAZED.

"I'm hot—I'm taking a shower," KRAZED said, as he walked toward my shower.

"There's people in there fucking," I reminded KRAZED.

"Fuck them—they can watch me," KRAZED said.

"Want to come help me baby sit?" I asked the cheerleader, knowing she would not turn down the offer.

"Ya," the cheerleader said, laughing.

We followed KRAZED into the bathroom as two couples were fucking on the toilet, and inside my shower. With zero fucks, KRAZED stripped butt-ass-naked, steps over the couple in the shower as his balls and dick rested two feet from the chick's head—the girl that was in the shower, riding her boyfriend.

"What are you doing?" the guy asked KRAZED, as his girl sat on his dick, while he laid on his back on my shower floor.

"Taking a shower…what the fuck are you guys doing?" KRAZED asked the couple, as he turned on the shower.

Once KRAZED turned on the shower, getting himself and the couple wet, the chick and guy get up and run out of the shower, as the girl shouts, "fucking asshole!"

"Love you, too, love!" KRAZED shouted to the fleeing, wet-naked chick, as she picked up her clothes.

The couple on the toilet continued to fuck, not taking any notice to us in the bathroom as KRAZED took a shower, trying to cool down and wash off the body paint.

The cheerleader was wearing a bathing suit and athletic shorts, so she just stripped off her shorts and jumped in the shower, rubbing the body paint off KRAZED's back, as I guarded the bathroom.

"Thanks, love," KRAZED said to the cheerleader.

"How old are you, water goddess?" KRAZED turned around and asked the cheerleader as they both stood in my shower, soak and wet.

"I turn 17 next week," the cheerleader said, smiling.

"Well, you are stunning, my little Greek Goddess… Sexy like that sexy goddess, Poseidon," KRAZED told the cheerleader.

"Poseidon was a male, dumbass," I reminded KRAZED, laughing.

"That's right! Amphitrite was the wife of Poseidon. You're beautiful like Amphitrite," KRAZED told the cheerleader.

"And after you lose your virginity, I will surely fuck the shit out of you," KRAZED informed the cheerleader, as they both stood in the shower, while she blushed and laughed.

"Come on, Romeo—you're drunk—let's get you out of the shower," I told KRAZED, helping him out of the shower, while handing them both a towel.

After getting dressed, KRAZED turns around and smacks into the bathroom wall, as he tried to exit the bathroom.

"What retard put a wall there?" KRAZED asked, as he backed up and walked out of the bathroom on his second attempt.

At that point, KRAZED walks towards the dance floor when Levi's ex-girlfriend, Ashley, runs up and hugs KRAZED.

"Hey, love—how are you?" KRAZED asked Ashley.

"You're all wet…are you hot?" Ashley asked KRAZED, laughing.

"I was until I took a shower," KRAZED said, laughing.

At that point, Levi, one of the Four Horsemen, runs up and pushes KRAZED, yelling, "what the fuck are you doing with my girl?"

KRAZED and Levi were both shit-faced drunk, and Levi was still pissed off about Ashley breaking up with him; however, KRAZED had no idea about Ashley and Levi breaking up, and KRAZED, in all honesty, did nothing wrong besides talking to Ashley after she sneaked a hug on him.

KRAZED pushed Levi, and said, "you have two seconds to walk the fuck away before I kick your teeth in!"

"Quit hugging my girl, bitch!" Levi shot back.

"I broke up with you, after you cheated on me with three different hoes," Ashley shouted at Levi.

"You're the one being a hoe ass slut—hanging all over my friend," Levi yelled at Ashley.

After saying that, KRAZED put himself in front of Ashley, getting in Levi's face, saying, "you have two seconds to back the fuck up, before I wipe this floor with your ass."

"You ain't going to do shit!" Levi shot back.

Before it could escalate any further, Big Boy, Brandon, and I got between the two of them, separating the two.

"Is it hoes before bros now?" Levi yelled and asked KRAZED, as we separated the two.

Now, at that point in time, there were two major cliques within our group of Krazees. KRAZED, Brandon, Matt, and I knew each other since 2nd grade, and damn near all of the bouncers at the party were our Krazees from the streets, while we did not come to know Levi until high school. Big Boy, Thomas and a few others knew Levi since grade school, so we were facing a dilemma if KRAZED and Levi threw punches.

Levi and Big Boy could fight, but you have not seen psycho until you have seen KRAZED pissed off and fighting; not only that, but KRAZED's bouncers, the ones he called his "Lions", they were just as fucking crazy. When I say crazy…I mean off your meds crazy. KRAZED and his "Lions" have fought legit gang bangers.

Yes, Levi, Thomas, and Big Boy were fighters, but under KRAZED and his "Lions", there were no rules when it came to fighting, because they fought to win, at all costs.

I knew I had to keep the peace in the house before things got bloody, so I told Brandon to turn on some dance music; however, my plan back fired.

Yes, when Salt Shaker blared throughout the house, KRAZED led Ashley to the dance floor and started freak dancing.

Now, let me tell you how KRAZED's mentality works… When you start shit with KRAZED, he is going to find every little thing that he knows will piss you off, ensuring he pisses you off, daring you to retaliate.

KRAZED will never take the first punch—it is a code he lives by—but he will entice you, and bait you in. Once you take that first swing, get ready for a fight.

I have seen both Levi and KRAZED fight, and they both are ruthless. I knew it was going to get bloody real quick once KRAZED led Ashley to the dance floor and started freak dancing.

Ashley was wearing a white skater dress… At that point, Ashley bent over, grinding her ass all over KRAZED's dick, when KRAZED flipped up Ashley's dress, revealing her ass cheeks and pink thong… KRAZED then starts playing with Ashley's thong string, and out of nowhere, Levi sucker-punches KRAZED in the side of the face, sending KRAZED to the floor.

Before any of us could react, KRAZED jumps up, choke slams Levi up against the wall, using his left hand, while pounding Levi in the face with his right.

KRAZED will tell you he does not feel anything during fights. I have seen KRAZED take a brick to the head and then get back up to beat the dude's ass in the alley, as KRAZED bled profusely from the head, eventually super gluing his head to stop the bleeding.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7… I seen KRAZED punch Levi seven times in the face before anyone could react. On the 8th swing, Thomas sucker punches KRAZED, knocking him to the floor, as Levi slid down the wall bleeding out his nose and mouth.

Before KRAZED could get up, three bouncers had Thomas on the floor kicking and punching him in the head.

Big Boy runs up and punches one of the bouncers before KRAZED jumps up and smashes a wooden chair across Big Boy's head, breaking the chair in pieces, causing Big Boy to hit the floor, hard, causing a loud thud, shaking my entire house.

Levi stands up and tries to pull one of the bouncers off Thomas when KRAZED runs up and sucker-punches Levi, sending him to the floor.

Meanwhile, Brandon, Matt and I try and break up the fight, while holding back the party crowd that stood around watching and cheering.

After KRAZED punched Levi for the last time, Brandon and Matt slam KRAZED up against the wall, telling him "it's over—the fight is over."

Bleeding from his nose and mouth, KRAZED nodded in agreement. As the rest stood up on their feet, Camila blurts out, "are you children done fighting now?!"

"You dumb fucks broke your own rule!" Camila screamed, reminding KRAZED and the Four Horsemen of the party rules.

"Party foul, retards!" Brandon shouted, pissed off.

"Cops! Cops! Cops in the front," someone yelled.

"Into the walls!" I shouted as Brandon and Matt helped me direct everyone into the secret tunnels of my house.

The tunnels were pitch-black behind the walls, while at-least 200 people crammed into the tunnels. The rest of the people, mostly those in the backyard, took off running and hoping into their cars and taking off.

KRAZED, Levi, Big Boy, Thomas, Echo, Camila, and Trisha ran and hid in the upstairs guestroom, while Brandon and Matt stayed downstairs with me to deal with the cops.

Luckily, we knew the cop that knocked on the door, as he was a fucker that we knew from school. He had graduated two years ahead of us, and we all played football together in high school.

He was also the same cop that got KRAZED out of a DUI, two days after boot-camp; now, he is a detective, but that is for a different story.

He and his backup were the only two cops that showed up, in a single cop car.

"Turn down the radio…and get everyone inside. We got a call saying there were people yelling and screaming in the backyard," our buddy, the cop, tells me.

"Right on," I said.

"Half of your party ran out of the backyard when we showed up. Take it easy, Mike—and no streaking tonight," our cop buddy said, smiling.

"We're too fucked up for that tonight," I said, smiling.

"No drinking and driving, either," our cop buddy said, sternly, as he walked off the porch with his backup to their car.

"Right on," I said, before closing my front door.

Everyone came out of hiding, and started partying again, without the music, and this time, without the Civil War.

KRAZED, Levi, Big Boy, Thomas, and several of our bouncers looked like shit…and they were all drunk off their asses.

They all had a bloody nose, and at-least one black eye, while Big Boy's head dripped blood for several minutes from where KRAZED hit him in the head with the chair.

"Get the super glue, Mike," KRAZED demanded.

Using his street-medicine, KRAZED super glued the cut on Big Boy's head, stopping the bleeding.

Levi, looking like absolute shit, walks up to KRAZED and holds out his fist. KRAZED fist-pounds Levi's fist, and not a single word was said or mentioned between those that fought, as if the fight had never occurred.

"Waterfall, you big bitch!" KRAZED said to Big Boy, challenging him to another game, trying to defeat Big Boy, the reigning champ.

"Another easy win," Big Boy said, laughing.

"I'm just trying to get this fucking headache to go away," KRAZED said, laughing.

After seven-straight beers, KRAZED called it quits, losing again to Big Boy.

"I can't feel my face—thank god—so I'm going to bed now," KRAZED said, after losing in waterfall.

"I'm going, too," Camila said, informing KRAZED.

"Come on my Aztec Goddess," KRAZED said to Camila, as he wrapped his arm around her.

"Guestroom! Dresser has a box of condoms," I reminded KRAZED.

KRAZED threw up the street-salute, as he and Camlia walked upstairs to the second floor, because KRAZED swears up and down he saw a black woman upstairs one night, so he calls the third floor "bad voodoo", but that is for a different story.

Five minutes later, as the party resumed, we all hear the bed squeaking up stairs and Camila moaning, and then a loud thud.

"They're going to fall through the fucking ceiling," Matt said, laughing.

I run upstairs to see what the hell the loud noise was, and when I walked into the guestroom, I saw Camila on top riding KRAZED, while KRAZED grabbed both tits, with both hands.

"What the hell was that noise?" I asked KRAZED.

"We broke your bed," KRAZED said, laughing.

"You owe me, bitch-tits," I told KRAZED.

"Get out of here, puta—I'm trying to get fucked!" Camila yelled at me, before I walked out and closed the door.

Levi and Ashley hooked up for the night, but would never get back together in a relationship. Brandon passed out on the couch, while Big Boy and Thomas shared my parent's bed...not fucking, of course...just sleeping... I figured I had better clarify.

Matt ended up fucking the virgin cheerleader, popping her cherry, while I passed out in my bed with Echo and Krisha, without getting laid.